There are so many paths to misery, but these 5 are true classics that have been handpicked to accelerate your journey. Try these examples à la carte, or in order for greatest impact.
1. Compare yourself to others.
Especially to people that have more experience and longevity in your field.
2. Dwell on what you don’t have.
Pack away all your accomplishments and the things that are going well. Spend some time, preferably on your couch that’s covered in cat hair while you eat cereal straight from the box, and really think about everything you don’t have or haven’t done. For red level crisis, add alcohol or mass quanties of sugar. How about a Coke with that cereal?
3. Do nothing.
When in doubt, don’t do anything. Remember, a little action in any direction can be enough to get you back on track, so remain motionless! Stagnation is your friend.
Who wants to hear about your problems, anyway? Once you finish the box of cereal, put mayonaisse on some stale crackers and look at your successful friends on Facebook. Whatever you do, don’t reach out!
5. Talk bad to yourself.
Rely on your favorite list of private insults that you would never dream of saying to someone else, but that you relish berating yourself with. Just say them over and over again in your head. Try adding words like “worst,” “never,” and “always.” Example: “I am the worst artist who never makes money and will always be stuck.”
Pour yourself another Coke and repeat.
If you experiment with this series, I’d love to know how things worked out for you!