Last weekend, 999 “unconventional” people I and gathered in Portland, Oregon for the 2nd World Domination Summit, the brainwhale of Chris Guillebeau. The central topic of the summit was “How do you live a remarkable life in a conventional world?” As you can imagine, this attracts all kinds of writers, bloggers, world travelers, entrepreneurs, and otherwise tattooed people.
Perhaps you’ve heard internet murmurs about the event by now. Brene Brown brought us all to our feet for a unison singing of “Don’t Stop Believing,” Scott Harrison of charity: water asked of us to donate our birthdays to his cause (we said yes), and Chris even gave each attendee $100 to go do good with. There were workshops and food carts and donuts and hammocks and sumo suits.
But you haven’t heard the story of one very quiet moment. My favorite moment.
photo by Armosa Studios
The first morning of the conference, we all got settled into the theatre for the morning speakers. 1,000 seats, 1,000 attendees. The room was buzzing with excitement as people connected with their online buddies or chatted up strangers.
The woman next to me and I were making small talk: what do you do, how did you find out about the conference. Conversation paused for a second. We both looked around the theatre. A breath. Then:
“Isn’t it amazing that there are 1,000 people like us?”
She started to tear up. So did I.
—-
Belonging.
I have a notebook full of quotes and ah-has from the weekend, but what I experienced was belonging.
It was someone buying me a donut without me asking.
It was dancing like a full-out goober with a couple hundred people.
It was knowing shared laughter at things you know other people just wouldn’t get.
It was happily sharing meals with people who would not otherwise spend time together.
It was 1,000 people standing in unison, without hesitation, when asked to donate their birthdays to charity.
It was insta-friend. Just because you were there.
When was the last time you truly felt like you belonged?
photo by Armosa Studios
—-
After the summit, on my way to the airport, I instinctively kept looking at people’s torsos to see if they had a WDS badge. I had looked for badges as I walked around the city during the weekend, because Badge = You Get It. It means in some way, You Get Me. It means acceptance. Openness. It means I can say hi and walk with you to the next event.
That badge? It means you and me belong.
—-
Where do you feel a belonging? Why do we need to belong, and how does belonging change us? Make a friend in the comments.
Gathering light,
READ THE COMMENTS OR ADD YOURS
Wow Laura, that sounds amazing. I felt all butterflies in my stomach just reading. I want to go next time!!! Lisa xx
Lisa, it’s an awesome weekend. Hope you can make it!
WOW! Great post Laura.
This post made me feel like I am part of that 1000. I am hopeful and thankful that there are people like me out in the world. Trinidad is such a tiny island, I sometimes I dont think that there are many people here who get what I’m trying to do. Thank you for sharing this.
We get it!
I feel like I belong when someone leaves a nice comment on my blog that is sincere and says in different words “I get what you do and I like it!”. That’s my sense of belonging. Even if it’s just a handful of people…that’s enough! Rock on!
Sitting on the sidewalk at a street fair, sharing a donut. Who would’ve thought that would end up being a great memory from WDS? And yet it was.
So glad to run into you there, and also, you were the last person I said goodbye to (also one the sidewalk).
You’re right, of course – we belong.
See you again soon!
Thanks, Nate!
Beautiful post, Laura! So glad we met in person at WDS
.
You know Laura, we are connected to more than just the 1000 people who were at the summit. Just think – if each one of those 1000 people were “connecting” with 2 people through email, and then those 2000 extra connected with someone who understands them, we are all connected to each other! The world is so much better off due to the internet. Our small contingent of “like minded people” just keeps getting bigger and bigger. Now that’s a sense of belonging!!!!
Yes, there are a lot more of “us” out there. A lot. Being in the same space and having shared experiences was really powerful.
Why is it that feelings of belonging are so rare? Beautiful when they happen, but it is oh-so rare. I feel blessed that you shared that moment with us. I felt almost a part of it.
YES!! THIS!! I kept trying to explain why I was so overwhelmed to my family I called back home or to friends who hadn’t come to the conference. The only thing I could even try to explain was how amazing it was to be in a crowd of 1,000 people knowing that every single one of them “gets me”. Such an overwhelming feeling. : )
Great post. There were so many moments that together added up to an incredible weekend. And you are so right, just being there is like an automatic entry into a world of positive people who are doing such interesting, inspiring, and amazing things. One of my best moments was my unintended ‘air guitar’ session. For an introvert such as myself, I just got swept up in the music and the moment, and temporarily became a big extrovert. Lastly, I also agree that it it can be hard to accurately convey the feelings associated with the weekend to those that were not there, especially family and friends who hold different perspectives.
Air guitar! Thanks for rocking out for us, Steven. Another memorable moment.
YES! It was such a great experience. Thanks for writing this…I completely concur (and Bollywood dancing? Who knew???)
Sarah, I saw you a couple times but never managed to say hi. So hi!
I think this sense of belonging is a re-frame– or an oft-followed prescription– to cure the fear of being alone.
I think it’s why people go to church who really don’t want to be there (Read Mark Twain’s Letters from the Earth), or even join terrorist organizations. I think we come from a vast realm where as spirit we can travel at the speed of light to anywhere, and then we choose to incarnate into a tiny body in what now appears to be a very limited existence. We spend much time searching for that original sense of connectedness with the Divine. Some escape the pain through addictions, others seek to heal it through gatherings of like minds.
I think the sense of seeing and being seen is a primal need, the desire to hear and to be heard is an undercurrent of so many destructive behaviors, and a catalyst to some very beautiful ones. LIke Chris gathering 1,000 like minds in one room, or any positively influenced social gatherings, we can then say, “I see you” (like in Avatar), and “I feel seen.” What a tremendous gift we all gave to each other!!!
Blissings and gratitude to all,
Dave
Thanks for posting this…I totally feel like an addict, scouring the internet for blog posts about #WDS2012 because I want just one more hit of it. Last year’s WDS was great…this year’s was amazing! Hung Pham’s post from the WDS Facebook page captured exactly what I was thinking: “The WDS experience is so amazingly out of this world that its kinda like being abducted by aliens, only difference is you go willingly. You remember everything but still not sure what the hell happened. You want to tell everyone you know but unfortunately not everyone will believe you and some may even think you are nuts. Only those that have shared this experience with you can truly understand how you feel and how you life will be forever changed!”
Daniel, I love the addict comment, and I love Laura’s post. Resonating big time with this! Portland has started a FB page, and I’m so glad because it’s a challenge for me to stay connected to the amazing wonderfulness that the weekend was. Belonging is so important, and being able to meet a fellow traveler/WDSer for coffee makes me relax that the magic isn’t going to be dulled so much that it slips away.
Wow! Sounds like an amazing weekend! I’m so glad that you had the opportunity to go. Those sorts of things stay with you for a while and have such a positive effect. I love that it was happening and that all those people are putting that great energy out into their circles now – thanks for sharing it with us!
PDX WDS on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/152882858169265/
Portland people, represent.
When/where do I feel I belong?
This May at an unschooling conference (in Vancouver because it seems all good things happen in the Portland area!). Being in a space where children were seen as complete people worthy of the same dignity, kindness and courteous respect we adults are worthy of.
When I’m with other women and we’re sharing intimately from our own Truths while being honored exactly as we are.
Those are moments when I feel that I completely belong when with others.
On my own I pretty much always feel that way these days – after a long, long journey learning how to love myself radically <3
Yes, what an awesome weekend Laura. I had the same revelation: These are my people. Thanks for being one of them.
I felt like I belonged the when Brene Brown told us to know that “No one belongs here more than me.” And to “operate from the place that I’m worthy and loving and I deserve to be seen.” Practicing this is taking me to a deeper level of self-love. It doesn’t get any better than that!
“You get it. You get me.”
A thousand times yes and the best feeling in the world. Combined with Brene’s “No one belongs here more than me.” and it truly expresses the best of WDS!
Thanks for the great info from the weekend..If I am close the the WDS next year. I am sooo going..Thanks again for the recap.
Kinda got teary-eyed just reading this, friend. Your growth and awareness is always so inspiring. This sounds like a truly uplifting experience.
Xo
Talia
Thanks, T. Always glad to see you here.
Exactly. You captured my experience exactly. I always feel like others are trying to box me in and round out my rough edges. I have some serious extremes and I loved that WDS valued them which in turn freed me up to really be there for others and contribute my full value. I ended up speaking to people all over Portland just because they had the WDS globe somewhere on their persons. Every encounter made my life a little more. I do hope to meet you in person next year
Laura,
The feeling you experienced is EXACTLY the feeling that people share at Burning Man….that they have found their home of kindred spirits. I’ve been to both…it’s the same, only at BM you can dress freaky as well. It was a great weekend and I’m already looking forward to next year.
Kevin
Ha ha! Good comparison, Kevin. I have friends that swear by BM, and other than sand in every crevice and freaky clothes, the community aspect does sound similar.
Okay Laura, you must have sneaked into my brain while I was sleeping last night… My exact words for the week-end were also “belonging”. And also the shared meals, the donuts, the dancing… shared experiences, is what it really comes down to.
Next year I’m bringing my man, because I want him to share this experience too!
It was lovely meeting you, you are incredible.
Blogs, dreams, whatever. I’m always finding ways to get my message out
Thanks, Nathalie. It was a pleasure meeting you!
Such an amazing moment that I’m sure everyone there felt- so glad you expressed it here! I get that “I belong” feeling in a yoga studio, at my parent’s house, in a cooking class- all places where I feel an emotional connection with the events and people around me. So, I believe that the “I belong” feeling can be replicated and given to anyone, anywhere, anytime as long as there is an emotional connection between the people involved. If we all live authentic and full lives with an open connection with the people around us, everyone can have that “I belong” feeling.
What an incredible post. You’ve so eloquently encapsulated what it was that made the weekend what it was. What is it that draws together hundreds of people from completely different backgrounds? Why does the gathering not only feel beneficial, but necessary? You’re absolutely right – it’s about that underlying connection, agreement about how one should live their life (community, adventure, and community), and that overwhelmingly beautiful sense of belonging and being understood. Hopefully I’ll see you there next year!
Well put, Laura – I’ve never felt so much connection in my life, wasn’t that just incredible? I was doing the same thing in the airport, hoping to see someone with a shirt or badge.
I’m not one to hold on to things, but I’m keeping my badge because it’s just got so much good juju.
I’ll be back for 2013, and looking to meet as many WDSers in the meantime as I can! Love this tribe. 
Great to meet you in person Laura! I also enjoyed dancing like a goober right down there with you!
Wow Laura, you did an amazing job capturing the feeling in words. As someone else mentioned already, I too got butterflies just reading your post. I will be looking for those t-shirts in every airport from now until WDS2013!
Yup, you just about summed it up. Thanks for the invitation to become friends. See you at WDS 2013!
P.S. Lovely blog!
Oh Laura you brought tears to my eyes. As I’m shifting and changing my life to the one it’s actually meant to be I’ve been looking for ‘my people’. It’s been a bit lonely…it will take time. So the thought of 1,000 people connecting in such a way is just spectacular and oh so reassuring. Thank you.
Totally awesome – I’ll be there next year too!
I found out about WDS too late to attend for 2012, but I’m so hoping to go next year. That desire is for the same reason you mentioned. It’s about finding people who bring that instant connection. It’s about spending time with those who do “get you” and because of it, we all come out of the experience richer.
Thank you for sharing this with us.
Wahoooooooo! xo
Oh Laura how wonderfully you describe the experience. I was there last year and that is just how I felt. I belonged. I am so very sad I could not get there this year. Yes, there was at least one empty seat and only 999 attendees. I waited till the last minute to decide and could not transfer my ticket. I was so looking forward to meeting you too.
Good news, I took advantage of the ticket deal for next year!!! See you then?
XO
I hope so!
I missed your moments Laura but I had my own, just the way you described. Powerful moments of recognition, of my tribe and a shared vision x 1000. It was almost overwhelming in its loveliness. And so exciting knowing that you get me and I can accost you in the airport as I did a young woman on her way to Toronto who I recognised by the world she carried on her back! You and I didn’t meet in person but we might as well have done because I understand exactly what you mean and how you feel about belonging.
Here’s to you and our tribe that’s growing.
Let’s meet up next year !
That would be great, Maggie. I would love to be accosted in an airport by a WDSer.